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Paris Hilton ahead of McCain, Obama in new poll.

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Party Party's hopeful, Paris Hilton in her new ad, urging Americans to vote for her, "coz, it would be, like, totally cool."

Party Party's hopeful, Paris Hilton in her new ad, urging Americans to vote for her, "coz, it would be, like, totally cool."

Los Angeles, CA, August 6th, 2008 (Reuters).- A new Gallup poll taken yesterday showed socialite Paris Hilton ahead of hopefuls McCain and Obama in the presidential  race. According to the poll, if the elections were held today, Paris Hilton would take 42% of the votes, while Obama would get second place with 30% of the votes and McCain would be trailing close with 28%. The poll was taken by phone to adults 21 and up in the Beverly Hills area and has a 27.32% error margin.










When asked why they would vote for Paris’s Party Party, the most common reasons people gave were that she’s hot and she couldn’t be dumber than Bush, although both arguments are still under debate.


Paris’s campaign started last week, after McCain’s camp released an ad comparing Obama to Hilton and Paris. Althought Paris didn’t comment back then, she decided later to throw her hat into the presidential race by founding the Party Party, and presenting a presidential plataform, based in “like, totally coolness and stuff.”


In her first presidential ad, Hilton introduces herself to the 42 American people that don’t know who she is. “Hey America, I’m Paris Hilton and I’m a celebrity too,” Hilton declares breezily. “Only I’m not from the olden days and I’m not promising change like that other guy. I’m just hot and I want America to know I’m, like, totally ready to lead.”


She also takes a jab at “that wrinkly white-haired guy” and vowes to end his super old policies. “Like, if I’m elected president and stuff, I’d be like, totally making dancing legal. I’d also enact a new cool, like, law or something that would allow other containers to be used to serve beer, instead of only buckets, you know?” says Paris in her commercial.


Hilton then offers an alternative US energy strategy, “I suggest that Americans just ask daddy for a couple thousand dollars increase in allowence, get rid of the second driver and buy the building in front of their school or workplace so they wouldn’t have to drive. Energy crisis solved, I’ll see you at the debates, bitches!”


Hilton then signs off by declaring that she is now mulling her choices for vice president. “I’m thinking Nicole Richie, unless she starts squealing too loud.”


“I’ll see you at the White House,” Hilton adds. “Oh, and I might paint it pink. Bye!”


In a related event, Hilton’s mother Kathy, burned 10,000 dollars in her yard as a message to McCain. “I just wanted to show him what I’m doing with the money I had set apart for his campaign. That’ll show him to bite the hand that  feeds him,” she concluded as minimum wage house service and reporters were holding back tears.


When asked for comments on Hilton’s lead, McCain commented, “Paris Hilton might not be as big a celebrity as Barack Obama, but she’s certanly more famous than me. I’m still going to win, but I’m open for the vice president ticket with her if that’s the only way I can serve my country.”



One Response

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  1. We have been watching Paris Hilton’s BFF. Where do they get these people? They are from another world!

    Hunter Barnet

    July 27, 2010 at 2:38 pm

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