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Archive for the ‘September 2008’ Category

Mortgage forgiven for woman, 90, who shot herself. “We figured she won’t be paying anyway,” Fannie Mae.

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Akron, OH, October 5th, 2008, (Reuters).- Mortgage finance company

Vice president Dick Cheney expressed his opposition to the forgiving of the mortage. "It'll just encourage people to avoid their fiscal and financial resposabilities by shooting themselves."

Vice president Dick Cheney expressed his opposition to the dismissal of the mortgage. "It'll just encourage people to avoid their fiscal and financial responsabilities by shooting themselves."

Fannie Mae said it is forgiving the mortgage debt of Addie Polk, a 90-year-old woman who shot herself in the chest as sheriff’s deputies attempted to evict her.

Fannie Mae announced later that it would dismiss its foreclosure action, forgive Polk’s mortgage and allow her to return to the Akron home where she’s lived since 1970.

“Given the circumstances, we think it’s appropriate,” Fannie Mae spokesman Brian Faith said, “we don’t think she’s going to pay us anyway as the hospital bills will steal all our, I mean, her money.”

Polk remained in Akron General Medical Center and was expected to recover from the chest wounds. Robert Dillon, Polk’s longtime neighbor and the one who took her to the hospital visited her today. “She said it was a crazy thing to do, now that she’s had time to think about it,” Dillon said. It’s not clear whether it was a reference to the shooting or to the government’s approval of the $700 billion bailout plan.

First debate polls show that Americans don’t understand statistics.

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Washington, DC, September 29th, 2008, (Reuters).- Just two days after the

McCain repeating a question to Obama's good ear because he couldn't hear it the first time.

McCain repeating a question to Obama's good ear because he couldn't hear it the first time.

first presidential debate that took place in the campus of the University of Mississippi Friday night, different polls have confirmed a tendency that experts had been long suspecting: Americans don’t understand statistics.

The CNN poll conducted after the debate with 501 undecided voters had the following results:

64% didn’t understand what “percentage” is.

24% thought an error margin was a page not being printed the right way.

13% said there was nothing better on TV that night.

The CBS poll involved telephone interviews with 524 adults and 3 minors and gave the following results:

35% found out that Obama really is black.

35% found out that McCain really is old.

31% felt dissapointed because Tina Fey didn’t show up.

Finally, the Fox News poll involved online interviews and gave the following results:

45% wanted to see more pics of Palin in her stars and stripes bikini.

32% asked for our credit card number in exchange of naked pictures.

23% were busy sending “internets” for their computer illiterate husbands.

1% noticed that the percentages on these polls didn’t add 100%.

1% went ahead and did the math just now.

ВОЯДТ is featured in Milan’s fashion week. “You like? I like”: Borat.

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Milan, Italy, September 26th, 2008, (Reuters).- Famous Kazakhstani reporter

Borat in Milan's fashion show. His dress was voted the most fashionable outfit of the week by the event's organizers.

Borat in Milan's fashion week. His dress was voted "the most fashionable outfit of the week" by the event organizers.

Borat, best known for his documentary on American life, was featured on the catwalk at Agatha Ruiz de la Prada’s show in Milan on Friday, bringing up the value of the playful show.

Borat is in Milan aiding his friend Bruno, a flamboyant Austrian fashionista make a new film.

He bowled onto the start of the catwalk rolled up in what turned out to be a long, black caped outfit with eccentric accessories. No one from the audience was able to tell that it wasn’t part of the show.

Models had kept their cool but the designer was visibly upset when she appeared at the end of the show because people wanted to buy Borat’s outfit rather than hers.

The designer said Borat’s dress was inspired by Spanish painter Diego Velazquez’s paintings.

Canadian terrorist found guilty.

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TORONTO (Reuters) – A Toronto-area man was found guilty by an Ontario court on Thursday of being part of

Faced with terrorist's threats, the government has assigned mounties to protect Canada's most famous possessions, like the Stanley cup.

Faced with terrorist's threats, the government has assigned mounties to protect Canada's most precious possessions, like the Stanley cup.

 a Canadian Al Qaeda-style terrorist conspiracy, the first verdict tied to an alleged plot against key Canadian landmarks, such as the Mounties Igloo Headquarters and the Toronto Hockey Statium. 
The Newfee, who cannot be named because Canadian law prohibits the release of names of criminals who were 17 or younger at the time of the crime, was one of the “Kids in the Hall” suspects arrested in a police sting in 2006.

The members of the group were arrested after allegedly trying to buy three water guns and materials to build what they called “explosive putts” from undercover Anaheim Ducks.

However, charges against seven of the suspects have since been dropped, mostly due to health care related issues, while defense lawyers have cast many of the suspects as naive kids who were drawn in by a small core of extremists, like Pamela Anderson, Dan Aykroyd and Avril Lavigne.

The guilty verdict, given by Ontario Superior Court Jean Chretien, was on the charge of “knowingly participating in or contributing to activities aboot threatening the national integrity of Canadian welfare, hey?”.

“I’m satisfied beyond a reasonable doubt that (the suspect) by his participation and contribution, intended to enhance the ability of the terrorist group to carry terrorist activities against key Canadian Institutes, such as the Molson Dry brewery, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police Headquarters and the Beaver Refuge National Park” he wrote from his chesterfield.

First Dudes’ debate goes well. “I just love Todd’s snow machine.”: Bill.

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New York, NY, September 24th, 2008, (Reuters).- The first First Dudes’

se me olvido

Todd giving Palin from the Palin-McCain ticket advice privatley in a clear, unambiguous way that doesn't make her look weak, as advised by Bill.

debate went smoothly, with Bill Clinton praising Todd’s ability to race snowmobiles. “I like it a lot,” he commented.

Fox’s Greta Van Susteren was the moderator in the debate in which Todd kept mostly silent while Bill offered him advice.

“It’s funny than when they hear ‘Clinton’ or ‘Palin’, it’s not us that people think about anymore, I feel a bit left out,” said Todd in one of his brief declarations.

Bill replied “Alaska’s First Dude is doing just fine.”

He also offered advise to Todd, who was resting his head on Bill’s shoulder, “Whenever you start changing the deck chairs and gender roles and family roles, you have to be prepared for psychological, as well as political, sparks to fly.”

“What do you think I should do?” asked Todd, to which Bill answered “the trick is to give support that is unambiguous and clear and to also be there with advise privatley, but do it in a way that doesn’t, in a funny way, make her look weak.”

Todd confessed to Bill that he felt intimidated by the media. Bill replied “Keep that smile, don’t get defensive, try to answer the best that you can and go on.”

The debate ended with Bill saying he admires Todd. “He must have something going if he can finish that 500 mile race with a broken arm,” Bill praised Todd.

Palin, from the Palin-McCain ticket, takes a fast course in world leaders with REAL world leaders. “More fun than wikipedia”:Palin

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New York, NY, September 23rd, 2008, (Reuters).- In order to boost her

Sarah Palin with the girl she was assigned to work with in her new geography class. "I wish they had assigned me someone mature and who at least knew the capital of Mexico," said the small girl.

Sarah Palin with the girl she was assigned to work with in her new geography class. "I wish they had assigned me with someone mature and who at least knew what the capital of Mexico is," said the small girl.

foreign relations credentials beyond seeing Russia from her house, the Palin-McCain campaign is having Sarah Palin take a crash course in word leaders by having them parade in front of her in next week’s United Nations General Assembly. She will be able to take notes on the names that are too hard for her to pronounce.

“Well, since I had never met a foreign head of state, like none of the previous vice-presidential candidates in history did, and I had never traveled outside the US until last year when I went to Canada to get some cheap medicines, the Palin-McCain campaign thought it would be a good idea to have a show-and-tell class of world leaders. It certanly beats looking them up in wikipedia,” commented Palin.

The first on the list was US-imposed Afghan President Hamid Karzai. “The encounter went remarcably well. We spoke for hours,” said Palin. “Next time I might even have a translator to find out what he’s telling me.”

Next on the list are (in order of apparition), Colombian president Alvaro Uribe, Georgian president Mikhail Saakashvili, Ukranian president Viktor Yuschenko, Iraqi president Jalal Talibani, Pakistani president Asif Ali Zardari and Indian prime minister Manmohan Singh.

“We thought it’d be important for her to meet the presidents the US placed on the Iraqi and Afghan governments first, as well as the presidents of those countries who provided troops or permissions to use their territories in the Afghanistan and Iraq wars,” said spokesassistant Tracey Schmitt. “After the parade, she will have a quick test on names and color flag matching, but she will be able to use her notes and we don’t count spelling mistakes for the grade.”

Reporters who wanted to see the encounters were banned initially. “We don’t want to get her nervous, so let’s keep the cameras in and the questions out, mmmkay?” had said spokesassistant Tracey Schmitt ealier. When the media refused to give coverage, Schmitt relented “it was all just a misscommunication oopsie, ya really didn’t think I was serious, did ya?”

Palin from the Palin-McCain ticket plays it safe.

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The villages, FL, September 21st, 2008, (Reuters).- Sarah Palin played it safe

Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton in the once-in-a-life-time call to stop sexism in the campaign. "I can see Russia from my house."

Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton in the once-in-a-life-time call to stop sexism in the campaign. "I can see Russia from my house," commented Palin.

 Sunday on her first trip on the campaign she now calls “the Palin-McCain ticket” to the battleground state of Florida.

In order to show how sure she is of her credentials, she went to perhaps the easiest place in Florida to get a large Republican turnout, stuck mostly to the themes she’s hit since the Republican convention and took no questions from reporters or the crowd.

Nevertheless, she was welcomed like a star, with tens of thousands cramming into a plaza and nearby streets. Some waited more than five hours in 92-degree heat to see her speak for 23 minutes. Palin told the crowd her daughters Piper and Willow got to go to Disney World, although this time they will be flanked by security in order to avoid any other embarrassing suprise pregnancy.

Her remarks hit most of the same points she’s made since McCain chose her. She did, however, update the stump speech to reflect last week’s turmoil in the financial markets.

“This week when the economic crisis threatened the livelihood of millions of Americans, John McCain took a clear stand and supported the goverment bailout even if he’s always condemned government bailouts. Our opponent refused to even take a stand on the position,” Palin said.

In another show of how much the party trusts Palin’s capacity, the Palin-McCain campaign has asked to reduce time for questions and answers in the Palin-Biden debate and to completly eliminate any interaction between the debaters. “We want her to focus on giving our message, rather than to be defending herself. We believe it could save us some money in air time,” a Palin-McCain campaign spokesperson said.

When asked about her lack of credentials in foreign relationships, he answered “Nonsense. We have checked her knowledge on the subject with very throughout questions, like ‘What foreign country is the closest to Alaska?’ and she answered ‘Russia’ before we even finished asking the question. Of course, with all that pressure anyone can forget that the correct answer is Canada, but we still believe she’s more than ready to be a heart attack away from the presidency.”

White House asks Americans go to into a $700B debt to help Americans who are in debt.

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WASHINGTON – The Bush administration is asking Congress to let the

President Bush speaking about his plan. "It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."

President Bush speaking about his plan. "It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."

government buy $700 billion in toxic mortgages in the largest financial bailout since the Great Depression, according to a draft of the plan obtained by The Associated Press.

The plan would give the government broad power to buy with tax payer’s money the bad debt of any U.S. financial institution for the next two years. It would raise the statutory limit on the national debt from $10.6 trillion to $11.3 trillion to make room for the massive rescue. The proposal does not specify what the government would get in return from financial companies for the federal assistance. When asked about this, the president said “Oppsie!”

“We’re going to work with Congress to get a bill done quickly,” President Bush said at the White House. Speaking fast so as not to discuss the details of the plan, he said, “This is a big package because it was a big problem. There’s no need to worry now on who’s to blame for this economy crisis, which really isn’t a crisis because the economy is sound solid, but we’ll manage to blame it on the terrorists eventually.”

Administration officials and members of Congress were to negotiate throughout the weekend in a non-disclosed spa-resort with casino on how to best use the taxpayers’ money in order to avoid dire economic consequences.

Bush said he’s making average citizens take on the biggest debt since the depression because he’s worried the financial troubles could “ripple throughout” the economy and affect average citizens. “The risk of doing nothing far outweighs the risk of the package, and over time we’re going to get a lot of the money back. It shouldn’t take more than 50 or 70 years.”

He added, “For some obscure reason which I can’t begin to phantom, people are beginning to doubt our system, people were losing confidence and I understand it’s important to have confidence in our financial system.”

“In my judgment, based upon the advice of a lot of people who know how markets work because I certanly don’t, this problem wasn’t going to be contained to just the financial community,” the president said. He said he was concerned about “Sesame Street” and that what happens on “Wall Street” affects “Sesame Street” right before one of Dick Cheney’s aides came to correct him.

Written by Flippyman

September 20, 2008 at 8:08 pm

Satellite images prove that tons of killing, not surge, helped reduce violence in Iraq.

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Baghdad, Iraq, September 19th, 2008, (Notimex).- Satellite images taken at night show heavily Sunni Arab

The sure has never the less brought safety and comfort to Iraqi children.

The surge has nevertheless brought safety and comfort to Iraqi children.

neighborhoods of Baghdad began emptying before a U.S. troop surge in 2007, graphic evidence of ethnic killing that preceded a drop in violence, according to a report published today.

The images support the view of international refugee organizations and Iraq experts that a major population shift was a key factor in the decline in sectarian violence, particularly in the Iraqi capital, instead of the troop surge that came too late and hadn’t much left to kill.

Minority Sunni Arabs were driven out of many neighborhoods by Shi’ite militants enraged by the bombing of the Samarra mosque in February 2006. The bombing, blamed on the Sunni militant group al Qaeda, sparked a wave of sectarian violence, which resulted in the killings of thousands. As a result, there are much less people alive to continue fighting.

“By the launch of the surge, many of the targets of conflict had either been killed or fled the country, and they turned off the lights when they left,” geography professor John Agnew of the University of California Los Angeles, who led the study, said in a statement. “Basically, people were already dead before the US army could come and kill them.”

Written by Flippyman

September 19, 2008 at 11:11 pm

Palin’s husband refuses to testify. “She would fire me out of the house”: First Dude.

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The McCain-Palin's campaign has decided to issue a different independent subpoena for Todd Palin that isn't tainted with political context.

The McCain-Palin's campaign has decided to issue a different independent subpoena for Todd Palin that isn't politically tainted with partisanship.

Anchorage, AK, September 18th, 2008, (Reuters).- Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin’s husband has refused to testify in the investigation of his wife’s alleged abuse of power, and key lawmakers said Thursday that uncooperative witnesses are effectively sidetracking the probe until after Election Day. 
Todd Palin, who, unlike McCain, can send “internets” and participates in state business by e-mail, was among 13 people subpoenaed by the Alaska Legislature. Palin’s lawyer sent a letter to the lead investigator saying Palin objected to the probe and would not appear to testify on Friday.

“The objections boil down to the fact that the Legislative Council investigation is no longer a legitimate investigation because it has been subjected to complete partisanship and does not operate with the authority that it had at the time of its initial authorization,” McCain-Palin presidential campaign spokesman Ed O’Callaghan said. “We refuse to allow this blatant manipulation of procedures for political gain until after the election so that we can win it.”

Sarah Palin initially welcomed the bipartisan investigation into accusations that she dismissed the state’s public safety commissioner because he refused to fire her ex-brother-in-law, a state trooper. “Hold me accountable,” she said to an accountant at the time.

But she has increasingly opposed it since Republican presidential candidate John McCain tapped her as his running mate. Now she claims that she was missunderstood as she clearly said “Hold me a corner table.”

The McCain campaign dispatched a legal team to Alaska including O’Callaghan, a former top U.S. terrorism prosecutor from New York to bolster Palin’s local lawyer. “There’s no need to alarm, there’s nothing to worry about, it’s going to be perfectly fine. His fees are going to be payed with campaign contributions,” McCain reassured his top aides.

In the letter, Palin attorney Thomas Van Flein, who in addition to representing the Palins also represents the state of Alaka lists nine objections to the Legislature’s investigation into Gov. Palin. Van Flein also argues the subpoena is “unduly burdensome” because Palin has travel plans that require him to be out of the state. “This legislation clearly violates the people who might have broken the law’s right to do as they please and leave the state and go where the state powers have no jurisdiction, now that’ll be 150 dollars please,” said the attorney.