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Posts Tagged ‘Bill clinton

Hillary Clinton tries to be selected Obama’s Secretary of State. “She should continue to work in politics, otherwise she’d come home”: Bill.

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Hillary is already grooming Chelsea for a future political carreer. "I'll get a Clinton woman on the White House office even if that's the last thing I do," said Hillary, forgetting that Bill had done that plenty of times before.

Hillary is already grooming Chelsea for a future political carreer. "I'll get a woman into the White House, even if it's the last thing I do," said Hillary, forgetting that Bill had done it many times already.

Washington, D.C., November 13th, 2008, (Reuters).- Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton announced her intention to have a place in the current administration. Since she can no longer try for the president, vice-president or first lady position, she declared she wanted to be Secretary of State.

She spoke to the press about her qualifications and credentials in several areas, “I became a very hard working person since the day I realized that, like most Washington women, sleeping with Bill Clinton didn’t earn me anything. I also want to be an example for all those young kids who don’t know what work means. They think it’s a four-letter work,” said the Senator. “I also have experience. I have been tested many times. You never know what Bill might have brought home.”

Among other things, she said she has the experience to handle the economic crisis. “As I showed in my primary campaign, I have experience solving great problems, such as the economy. I will help set the conditions so that banks can flush money into businesses. I might even get a loan to pay my campaign debt. By the way, we are going to take away things from you on behalf of the common good.”

Bill Clinton also commented on his wife: “From my own experience I can tell you that she doesn’t go down without a fight.”

Homer Simpson will vote for Obama. Flanders says Palin is the most Okely Dokely of politicians.

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Springfield, Fox, October 2nd, 2008, (Reuters).- After watching tonight’s

Barack Obama is not too happy with Homer Simpson becoming his fan. "He makes Sarah Palin look smart"

Barack Obama is not too happy with Homer Simpson becoming his fan. "This guy makes Sarah Palin look smart."

debate, most people in Springfield finally took a stand in the presidential election. Homer decided to vote for Obama. Flanders thinks Sarah Palin, from the Palin-McCain ticket, will defend family values and morals.

In an exclusive interview with Kent Brockman from KBBL-TV channel 6 news, Homer Simpson declared that he will vote for Obama in the next election. “It’s time we have someone well versed on foreign relationships and national defense that will handle the economy well under the umbrella of jobs creations. He’s also connecting with the national feelings of opposing the Iraq war while we go and bomb Iran. I hope he plays the sax and is as cool as Bill Clinton. And he’s for controlling beer prices, mmmmmm, beeeeeeeeeeer.”

Oh the other hand, in a street interview, average Springfield citizen Ned Flanders said he supports Palin 100%. “I think it’s God’s will that she’s just a heartstroke away from the presidency. She will finally get creationism taught at public schools and defend us from our next door neighbors who happen to be foreign countries. She will also stop the killing of innocent babies and challenge other supreme court rulings that I’ll tell you later. And she will pray for our military men and women who are out on a task that’s sent by God. Yes, siree, that’s exactly what they’re going to do in a Palin and McCain administration. Do I think McCain is hurting her chances? Perhaps so.”

First Dudes’ debate goes well. “I just love Todd’s snow machine.”: Bill.

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New York, NY, September 24th, 2008, (Reuters).- The first First Dudes’

se me olvido

Todd giving Palin from the Palin-McCain ticket advice privatley in a clear, unambiguous way that doesn't make her look weak, as advised by Bill.

debate went smoothly, with Bill Clinton praising Todd’s ability to race snowmobiles. “I like it a lot,” he commented.

Fox’s Greta Van Susteren was the moderator in the debate in which Todd kept mostly silent while Bill offered him advice.

“It’s funny than when they hear ‘Clinton’ or ‘Palin’, it’s not us that people think about anymore, I feel a bit left out,” said Todd in one of his brief declarations.

Bill replied “Alaska’s First Dude is doing just fine.”

He also offered advise to Todd, who was resting his head on Bill’s shoulder, “Whenever you start changing the deck chairs and gender roles and family roles, you have to be prepared for psychological, as well as political, sparks to fly.”

“What do you think I should do?” asked Todd, to which Bill answered “the trick is to give support that is unambiguous and clear and to also be there with advise privatley, but do it in a way that doesn’t, in a funny way, make her look weak.”

Todd confessed to Bill that he felt intimidated by the media. Bill replied “Keep that smile, don’t get defensive, try to answer the best that you can and go on.”

The debate ended with Bill saying he admires Todd. “He must have something going if he can finish that 500 mile race with a broken arm,” Bill praised Todd.