The Press Posted in the Tribune Times

Funny news, trivia news, ironic news, sarcastic news and news news.

Posts Tagged ‘obladi oblada

Paul McCarney announces his plans to marry in the Colbert Report. “All I need is Love”, McCartney.

with one comment

When asked if he was afraid of another costly divorce with his new fiancée, the ex-beatle said "We can work it out."

When asked if he was afraid of another costly divorce with his new fiancée, the ex-beatle said "We can work it out."

New York, NY, January 28, 2009, (Reuters).- Ex-beatle Paul McCarntey appeared on “the Colbert Report,” answering questions to Stephen Colbert about his love life (McCartney’s, not Colbert’s).

Question: How did you get over the death of Linda, your first wife?

Answer: Obladi, oblada, life goes on.

Q: How did your second wife, Heather Mills, declared her love for you?

A: Baby, you’re a rich man.

Q: What did you tell her when she asked so much money for the divorce?

A: You never give me your money.

Q: What did you tell your lawyer about it?

A: Help!

Q: What did he tell you?

A: You’re going to lose that girl.

Q: Where is she now?

A: Back in the U.S.S.R.

Q: How did you feel after losing so much money in the divorce?

A: The fool on the hill.

Q: Do you regret that marriage?

A: I should have known better.

Q: Is there a lesson to that experience?

A: Can’t buy me love.

Q: How did you meet your current girlfriend, socialite Nancy Shevell?

A: She came in through the bathroom window.

Q: How did you find her?

A: I saw her standing there.

Q: How did you declare your love to her?

A: Love, love me do.

Q: Why do you want to marry her?

A: I’ve got a feeling and I love her.

Q: Where does your fiancée like to have sex?

A: Here, there and everywhere.

Q: Really? and how often does she want it?

A: Eight days a week.

Q: How do you manage to have sex at your age?

A: With a little help from my friends.

Q: How was sex with Linda?

A: Twist and shout.

Q: How was it with Heather?

A: Honey, don’t.

Q: And with Nancy?

A: A hard day’s night.

Q: Do you still take drugs?

A: Everybody’s got something to hide.

Q: What do you do when you have to appear in public after taking drugs?

A: Act naturally.

Q: Do past acquaintances or even total strangers ever try to claim they’re your offspring in order to rip you off your money?

A: Everybody’s trying to be my baby.

Q: Finally, is there something you’d like to say to your fans?

A: Happiness is a warm gun.