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Posts Tagged ‘war on terror

Shoes banned from flights within, to and out of the United States.

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President Bush as he dodges the shoe terror attack that prompted the banning of shoes in American flights.

President Bush as he dodges the shoe terror attack that prompted the banning of shoes in American flights.

Washington, D.C., December 16th, 2008, (Reuters).- As of today, passengers flying within, to, and out of the United States will not be allowed to wear shoes on their persons, nor to carry them in their luggage.

This is the latest item banning that has been implemented in order to avoid terrorists attacks. Previously terror weapons that had been banned are water bottles, face creams, nail clippers, and any reading material that is printed in Arabic (or a language that might seem Arabic to the flight attentants).

White House spokeslad Tony Frappuchino explained the measurement, “After the recent shoe terror attack on the president, we just can’t afford to have potential terrorists climb in our airplanes with those weapons on their feet. We have decided to act now, rather to wait until an American life is taken by a shoe to do something.

President George Bush commented on the shoe attack incident, “I’m not insulted. I don’t hold it against the government. We won’t even invade the country of the shoe thrower. Besides, Cheney told me that we already have.”

Iraq Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki commented on the incident as well, “It is not a behavior that reflects the feeling of all the Iraqis, only the ones that weren’t appointed to a government position by the Americans.”

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Canadian terrorist found guilty.

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TORONTO (Reuters) – A Toronto-area man was found guilty by an Ontario court on Thursday of being part of

Faced with terrorist's threats, the government has assigned mounties to protect Canada's most famous possessions, like the Stanley cup.

Faced with terrorist's threats, the government has assigned mounties to protect Canada's most precious possessions, like the Stanley cup.

 a Canadian Al Qaeda-style terrorist conspiracy, the first verdict tied to an alleged plot against key Canadian landmarks, such as the Mounties Igloo Headquarters and the Toronto Hockey Statium. 
 
The Newfee, who cannot be named because Canadian law prohibits the release of names of criminals who were 17 or younger at the time of the crime, was one of the “Kids in the Hall” suspects arrested in a police sting in 2006.

The members of the group were arrested after allegedly trying to buy three water guns and materials to build what they called “explosive putts” from undercover Anaheim Ducks.

However, charges against seven of the suspects have since been dropped, mostly due to health care related issues, while defense lawyers have cast many of the suspects as naive kids who were drawn in by a small core of extremists, like Pamela Anderson, Dan Aykroyd and Avril Lavigne.

The guilty verdict, given by Ontario Superior Court Jean Chretien, was on the charge of “knowingly participating in or contributing to activities aboot threatening the national integrity of Canadian welfare, hey?”.

“I’m satisfied beyond a reasonable doubt that (the suspect) by his participation and contribution, intended to enhance the ability of the terrorist group to carry terrorist activities against key Canadian Institutes, such as the Molson Dry brewery, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police Headquarters and the Beaver Refuge National Park” he wrote from his chesterfield.

Bin Laden’s driver convicted, gardener and cook still on the loose

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File photo of Osama Bin Laden with his butler Yasser Ghat Avar Yawish, who is also look for by the U.S. forces for ironing clothes that were used to support terrorism.

File photo of Osama Bin Laden with his butler Yasser Ghat Avar Yawish, who is also looked for by the U.S. forces for ironing clothes that were used to support terrorism.

Guantanamo Bay Naval Base, Cuba, August 7th, 2008 (Reuters).- A U.S. military jury sentenced Osama bin Laden’s driver Salim Hamdan to 6 months of house arrest and a fine of 3 million afghani (approx. 4.75 dollars), followed by anger management therapy and 1 month of community service, a surprise rebuke to Pentagon prosecutors who portrayed him as a member of the al-Qaida leader’s inner circle worthy of 2 life and 4 death sentences and penalty fees on over 30 speeding tickets.

Still U.S. authorities insist they could give him sub-human status and hold him indefinitely without charge at Guantanamo.

The judge, Navy Capt. Keith Allred, called Hamdan “small game,” and the jury apparently agreed, rejecting the recommendation of prosecutors who said that even giving him only two death sentences would send a message to would-be terrorists.

“I hope the day comes that you return to your wives an concubines and mistresses, and you’re able to be a provider and a husband in the best sense of all those terms,” Allred told Hamdan at the close of the hearing.

The prisoner, dressed in a dish-dash-ah and a shumagg, responded: “Adrusu allughah al arabia mundu shahr,” as he left the courtroom.

This case sets a precedent for next week’s trial of Bin Laden’s cook Bhada Fuhds, who was captured in a McDonald’s in Saudi Arabia, posing as a part time employee.

Bin Laden’s gardener and maid are still at large. The Bush administration has made a case against them arguing that had they not provided Bin Laden with a comfortable surrounding, he would not have had the concentration required to mastermind the 9/11 attacks.

New Anti-terrorist security measure: Santa’s List.

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Allegedly leaked picture of Santa being tortured by the US forces at Guantanamo in order to get his files for air flight passenger screening.

Allegedly leaked picture of Santa being tortured by the US forces at Guantanamo in order to get his files for air flight passenger screening.

Washington, DC,  December 16th, 2007 (Reuters).- The US goverment unveiled today a new anti-terror security measurement that, according to Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff, will enable officials to spot any passangers that might pose a terrorist threat to the USA air travel system; the use of Santa’s list and all his files.

The list, Chertoff assured, will allow the US security agents to find out who has been naughy or nice.The new security measurement will have potential passangers pre-screened, and checked twice. They will also have their records checked to find out what kind of toys they asked for when they were children. Air rifles, cowboy guns and little army men will allow the airline to either decline service to the passanger in question, or change his destination to Abu Ghabu, at the airlines discretion.

When confronted with questions about the rumors that Santa’s list and files had been obtained throught torture techniques, Chertoff answered: “The Supreme Court has ruled that the North Pole, like Guantanamo, doesn’t fall under the jurisdiction of the United States, and as such, their individuals aren’t entitled to the protection of its laws. Nevertheless, the US government has never resorted to nor will ever resort again to any kind of torture technique, which we throuroughly condemn. ”
The measurement, he added, is only the first step to a more complete security program that will keep America safe. “By 2010, cameras will have been installed in every home in America. We will see you when you’re sleeping. We will know when you’re awake. We’ll know if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake.”
 
When confronted with the complaints of individual rights watch groups, Chertoff commented “You better watch out, you better not cry, better not pout, I’m telling you why: Terrorists are comin’ to town.”